Accelerating Action: Unlearning Gender Roles for Real Change in the Workplace

When I was  writing this article, I found myself reflecting on what was it that had not been discussed before—what was yet to be highlighted in the pursuit of creating a more equal world ? I’m sure what I’m about to talk about today isn’t anything you haven’t heard before. But that’s exactly what makes this conversation so important.

We have been discussing this issue for years, raising awareness, and working tirelessly at multiple levels to address the systemic bias where one gender is consistently overlooked and denied opportunities. Despite all these efforts, little has changed. We're still having the same conversations, with no real progress. When I say there has been no real progress, I am referring to the way we perceive gender. In my view, this mindset is one of the biggest barriers hindering women’s progress at various levels. Let’s discuss!!

How do you believe daughters and sons are typically raised in a traditional setup? Do we nurture daughters to be self-sufficient in all aspects—mentally, physically, financially, emotionally—and encourage them to develop their own identity based on their own thoughts and beliefs?

Do we raise our sons to treat women as equals in every aspect, whether it's in domestic roles or professional ones? Equality starts at home, so do we teach them that learning life skills like cleaning, cooking, and household chores are essential for everyone, and not just for women? Do we teach our daughters the financial aspects of life and the work done outside the home, like paperwork for school, colleges, filing for any id, etc.? Are we creating an environment where our sons and daughters don’t see any gender roles, where every task is something everyone should be capable of doing? Are we raising and training them to be well-rounded individuals, mastering all life skills both at home and outside?

The truth is, we're not doing this. We're not raising them equally. Instead, we're raising and training them based on traditional gender roles. Yet, we still claim that women aren't capable of working outside the home, and that men aren't capable of handling tasks at home. These roles are so deeply ingrained in our upbringing and society that we conveniently overlook the privileges that come with being a man, while women come to see these disparities as the norm. Of course, men are also affected by the burden of financial responsibilities falling on one person. Even when both the husband and wife are working, the role of the primary breadwinner often falls to the man, which automatically shifts the mental and financial burden onto him. But while a man goes to work and comes home to relax, a woman, after a long day at work, is still expected to cook and take care of household duties.

Women are often seen as hiring risks if they’re of marriageable age or if there is a possibility that they might have children, which can impact their professional growth. Women are often judged if they choose to return to work right after giving birth, or prioritize their work, facing criticism from both family and society, with accusations that they are neglecting their children/family for a job. It's as if they alone are responsible for childcare/household responsibilities. While men also get married, they are rarely viewed as a hiring risk, as they are not expected to change their base location or take on family responsibilities. They aren’t judged for not spending enough time with their children/family or for not being hands-on with parenting or not being available at family gatherings. The understanding is that, because he is the man, he is simply tired from work. Men are not subjected to the same scrutiny during the hiring process or in societal expectations. We claim that we've made progress in the fight for equality, pointing out that women are now educated and working, but the reality is that the basics haven't changed. The traditional gender roles remain the same.

I want to take this opportunity to reach out to all the amazing women out there and remind you that you are more than what you're told to be. You are more than what is expected of you. You are capable of anything and everything. Don’t limit yourself to the gender roles society has assigned to you. Don’t let yourself become comfortable in this patriarchal setup, where you’re made to believe that it’s all for your benefit. Where you’re told you’ll be a 'bad girl/woman' if you don’t follow the traditional expectations for women. Break free from it. Understand that there’s a whole world out there waiting for you to showcase your incredible self. The people who truly love and care for you will never stop you from being yourself, chasing your dreams, or having your own identity and thoughts. They would never make you believe that your place is only at home, or that, even if you work, you are the sole one responsible for household chores. And if you choose to be a homemaker, they would never look down on you or disrespect you. Instead, they would appreciate and be grateful for all the unpaid labour you do. This includes your parents, siblings, partner, friends—everyone.

Once we believe in ourselves and take that step into the world to shine, we need allies in this fight for equality. We need men to be our allies, not our protectors or providers. The word ‘allies’ just sounds and feels so much more empowering than ‘protectors’. We wouldn’t need protection if we were treated as human beings, and not individuals meant to be kept under control. And we wouldn’t need to fight for equality if we were seen as equals, both at home and in the workplace. Because men hold positions of power in almost every area of life, men being our allies would be key to achieving equality for all.

I believe secure men would never feel the need to stop us from being out in the world, working alongside them, making decisions at higher levels, or taking advice and instructions from women in higher ranks. Similarly, secure women won’t feel threatened by other women and won’t try to bring them down. We need to cultivate these qualities within ourselves. To achieve true equality, we must strive to be better, more empathetic human beings. Are we ready for this?

In this year’s call to ‘Accelerate Action’, let’s promise ourselves that we will unlearn everything we've been taught that reinforces unequal structures, both at home and in our professional lives. Let’s be more empathetic toward each other, acknowledging and understanding one another’s struggles. Let’s be the ones who lift others up, while also challenging both our own and society’s patriarchal mindset.

P.S. – To everyone who believes inequality doesn’t exist, pause for a moment and consider whether that’s truly the case, or if it’s your privilege speaking. Could it be you who is unable to recognize the inequality faced by others? Or perhaps because you benefit from gender inequality you don’t want it to change, and prefer to deflect the conversation by claiming inequality doesn’t exist?